{"version":1,"type":"rich","provider_name":"Libsyn","provider_url":"https:\/\/www.libsyn.com","height":90,"width":600,"title":"Episode 5 - Feedback is a Gift","description":"Research shows that leaders typically avoid giving feedback, particularly the further away performance is from expectations. This week we look at a feedback structure that focuses on behaviour and the impact we have on others. TRANSCRIPT Hello and welcome to episode five of the Leadership Today podcast.  Each week we provide practical advice to address some of today\u2019s biggest leadership challenges. And this week\u2019s leadership challenge is a doozie - it\u2019s feedback. I\u2019m sure you\u2019ve heard the expression - feedback is a gift. But, let\u2019s be honest - not every gift we give is fantastic. In my family we have a Christmas tradition which is a variation of the Kris Kringle - the difference being that there\u2019s a $5 limit on each gift and the aim is to be as entertaining as possible - we call it the Krap Kringle (both with Ks obviously). Sure, everyone gets a gift, but most people don\u2019t keep them for very long. And research indicates that leaders avoid giving these gifts at work - they avoid providing feedback, and that lack of feedback actually gets worse as an individual\u2019s performance drops off. In other words, the further your performance is away from expectations, the less likely you are to receive feedback.  So what drives this? Well, leaders are often afraid to provide feedback - they are worried about how it will be received. But bad news doesn\u2019t improve with age. Typically the issue continues to build up, and there\u2019s often a clumsy confrontation which makes everyone feel worse.  Of course, feedback doesn\u2019t just have to be negative. However, in the busy-ness of life we tend to also miss the opportunities to provide encouraging feedback. In contrast, if you have ever worked in an organisation with a high-feedback culture, you\u2019ll instantly recognise how beneficial it was to your development. At a consulting firm where I was a leader, we made a habit after every client meeting of providing feedback - taking time to talk about what went well and what could be improved for next time. At first that felt pretty confronting and awkward. People would often just say that the meeting was \u2018good\u2019 or \u2018fine\u2019. But as trust was built, the appetite for real feedback increased. In fact, aspects of my behaviour that were completely blind to me were shared - both undiscovered strengths, and often simple changes I could make to improve my impact.  I spend much of my time now facilitating leadership programs, and this is a particularly rich feedback environment - feedback from the co-facilitator, from the clients and participants on the program as well. Sometimes that feedback can seem a little harsh. Sometimes the gift is particularly wrapped all that well. But that doesn\u2019t mean it\u2019s not the right gift. In fact that constant feedback has improved me a great deal and toughened me up. So here are a few key principles to keep in mind when it comes to feedback: Make it a habit - and do it close to the time - that\u2019s where my earlier example of providing feedback straight after meetings was great - it build the habit and it was immediately after the event Keep it balanced - look for the good as well as improvement - it\u2019s all developmental feedback Start by sharing your intent - if people are afraid or concerned they can\u2019t listen - let them know that you\u2019re on their side - are you really trying to help them, or are you wanting to hurt them? Setting that up as a habit really helps to ensure you\u2019re doing this from the right intent Stick to behaviour - it\u2019s like watching a video tape back - what did you actually see, and what was the impact on you and on others Check in later to confirm understanding - ask them to restate what their takeaway was from the feedback that you provided William Gentry shares a really helpful feedback format in his book called \u201cBe the Boss Everyone Wants to Work For\u201d - I\u2019ve provided a link to the book in the episode notes. www.amazon.com.au\/Be-Boss-Everyone-Wants-Work-ebook\/dp\/B01E4KC0V8 The approach is called SBI, named after the three components of the feedback approach he outlines. S stands for Situation - and in that stage you want to describe the exact moment the feedback relates to, being as specific as possible  B is for Behaviour - what you actually observed - and again that\u2019s like you\u2019re watching a video of the event back and describing it I is for Impact - this is describing the impact on you, and it can also be the impact on others if you observe that So let\u2019s apply that - I\u2019d like you to compare these two versions of the same feedback: The first version is this - \u201cDuring meetings lately you have being really rude.\u201d - so that feedback is not particularly helpful. Now let\u2019s compare that with using the SBI format - \u201c(S) Yesterday at the marketing meeting when Jane started presenting, (B) you leaned back on your chair, sighed, and started to use your phone. (I) I felt disappointed that you appeared disengaged from Jane\u2019s presentation\u201d. And then you want to allow the person to respond. Maybe they weren\u2019t being rude. Or maybe they received a text that lead to their response. There are a whole host of reasons for why they may have behaved the way they did. But none of these reasons change the impact on you and on others, and that\u2019s the important thing. You\u2019re not trying to guess at what drove their behaviour - you\u2019re just providing an insight into the impact they are having on others. The SBI approach works equally well for positive feedback. For example: Situation - During the interaction you just had with that customer who came in with a problem Behaviour - I noticed how you smiled and offered a number of helpful suggestions Impact - the customer ended up smiling and shaking your hand, and I was really impressed. This week I encourage you to practise feedback. Use the SBI model or similar. Try to catch people doing good things, and provide the positive feedback straight away.  Also, ask people for feedback on you, and be specific. If you just say \u201ccan you give me feedback\u201d, most people will say \u201cyou\u2019re doing fine\u201d. But if you say \u201ccan you give me feedback on how confident I\u2019m appearing in presentations\u201d, you\u2019ll receive much richer feedback. Next week we\u2019ll be talking about assertiveness - what it is, and how we can build it in ourselves and others. I look forward to speaking with you then. ","author_name":"Leadership Today - Practical Tips For Leaders","author_url":"https:\/\/leadership.today\/","html":"