{"version":1,"type":"rich","provider_name":"Libsyn","provider_url":"https:\/\/www.libsyn.com","height":90,"width":600,"title":"Practicing Direct Compassion","description":"I'm about to venture out to Breakneck mountain to meet with an old friend whom I haven't seen in ten years. I'll be off in the woods for the day, but promise to come back tonight to read your emails. Before I walk into the wild, I want to share with you what I learned from my recent trip back home. I learned the art of direct compassion. ---------------------------- I sat across from my father, stared into his eyes for an entire minute and said three words he hadn't heard a lot while growing up in a dilapidated mobile home park in Buffalo, NY. His eyes teared up and so did mine. I said, \u201cI love you.\u201d A rush of energy flooded through me and my father. Energy that brought the two of us closer together. Energy that helped us both reach deeper into ourselves. You see\u2026. a blue-collar man raised in the smoke of the railroad industry, my father grew up like many men. He learned that in order to get the job done, one must hold in his emotions. Life is hard and thick skin is what gets you through the hardships of life. True perhaps to some degree, but as Joseph Campbell reminds us, \u201cThe fundamental human experience is that of compassion.\u201d Compassion \u2014 showing love for others and love for ourselves\u2014 drives us all further down our own hero\u2019s journey. Because remember, the hero\u2019s journey isn\u2019t Frodo searching for a ring nor is it Luke Skywalker mastering his Jedi skills to overthrow an evil empire. These are just metaphor for the hero\u2019s journey told through a compelling story. The hero\u2019s journey is a journey inside. As Campbell himself put it: \u201cThe hero journey is inside of you;  tear off the veils and open the mystery of the self.\u201d To move further down the inner hero\u2019s journey, Campbell reminds us that we need to practice direct compassion for our self just as much as we do for others. My inner journey took a turn this past weekend and began with a six hour drive to my hometown Buffalo, NY. Instead of meeting up with a bunch of people and getting my whole family together, I did something different. I met with each of them for 1:1 quality time and did something I haven\u2019t done before. I looked them each in the eye and told them I loved them and explained why I do. Each of them teared up. And I did too. See, here\u2019s the thing: Direct communication is compassion for the soul. When\u2019s the last time you looked someone in the eyes, held their hand, and told them how you honestly feel? It\u2019s easier to go throughout our lives by avoiding eye contact and avoiding honest communication out of fear of argument. Why else are children often told to avoid topics of politics and religion at the dinner table? Consider, however, that by being honest in our communication we practice compassion for ourselves. Through this, we gain confidence in our own voice. Honest communication to others and ourselves is hard work. It\u2019s a lot easier to politely agree or nod your head with someone instead of disagreeing with them. It\u2019s a lot easier to avoid direct eye contact instead of telling someone they hurt you. It\u2019s quite awkward at first to look at someone other than your spouse directly in the eyes and tell them you love them. This type of communication moves the energy in our relationships and all parties involved grow because of it. I invite you to try this: Choose someone in your life that you appreciate, love platonically, or love romantically that perhaps you haven\u2019t told before or in a while. Or perhaps you haven\u2019t been direct in your communication of how you feel. Spend just one minute and look directly in their eyes and continue to tell them throughout this time why you appreciate them. That\u2019s it. Sounds too simple, yes. I thought so too. Thing is, many people (myself included) are not used to direct communication, so don\u2019t be surprised if this moves the person you speak with. Chances are you\u2019ll feel moved too because this directness opens doors to the self. Why? Because by doing so, you\u2019re showing compassion for your greatest self. As I continue to connect the dots in my life and grow into a more actualized being, I\u2019m learning that compassion for the self moves one further down the hero\u2019s journey. If we disagree with someone, if we feel hurt, or if we love someone and haven\u2019t deeply shared it, we\u2019re not being honest with ourselves. We\u2019re not showing compassion to ourselves. We\u2019re holding ourselves back from truly learning from the experience. And perhaps it\u2019s these lessons that we sometimes need to open a door to the next stage in our journey. What about you? Let me know what you think and share YOUR story with me. Reach out to me at yourlop.com. Well, that\u2019s my story for today. Thank you so much for joining me and I wish you a life full of love, light, and adventure. Want to say hello and share your thoughts?  Just head over to yourlop.com.. ","author_name":"Your Life on Purpose","author_url":"http:\/\/markwguay.me","html":"