{"version":1,"type":"rich","provider_name":"Libsyn","provider_url":"https:\/\/www.libsyn.com","height":90,"width":600,"title":"4217 She Gave Everything and Called It Love","description":"There\u2019s a tiredness that sleep doesn\u2019t fix. It\u2019s not in your body \u2014 it\u2019s in your soul. It\u2019s the kind of exhaustion that shows up when you\u2019ve been pouring and pouring and no one ever thought to ask if you were empty. You made breakfast, signed the permission slips, held the crying child, smiled through the chaos, late-night conversations \u2014 and when the house finally went quiet, you realized you had nothing left. Not for them. Not for yourself. Not for the woman you used to recognize. She gave everything and called it love \u2014 and you know her because you\u2019ve been her or might be her right now.  Question: When was the last time you were still here \u2014 fully here \u2014 and not just functioning? Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https:\/\/createyournow.com #ConfessionsOfAnUpsetMama #CreateYourNow #TodaysParent Some love looks like sacrifice. Then, there\u2019s a version of sacrifice that looks like vanishing. And somewhere along the way, a lot of mamas started confusing the two. You skipped lunch again. You can\u2019t remember the last book you read for yourself. You stopped calling your friend back \u2014 not because you don\u2019t love her, but because you ran out of energy three days ago and you\u2019re still running on empty. You surrendered your boundaries, your rest, your identity \u2014 and you wrapped it all in a bow and called it love. But here\u2019s the truth that might sting before it heals: selfless and self-less are not the same thing. One is generous. The other is gone. One pours from fullness. The other pours from fumes. And your family doesn't need a mama running on fumes. They need a mama who\u2019s still in the room \u2014 not just in the role. Matthew 22:39 says, \u201cLove your neighbor as yourself.\u201d Not instead of yourself. Not at the expense of yourself. As yourself. That little word carries the whole weight of what we\u2019ve been getting wrong. You cannot love others well from a place of self-neglect. You can\u2019t pour into your children\u2019s lives what you\u2019ve already drained from your own. The \u201cas yourself\u201d part isn\u2019t a footnote \u2014 it\u2019s the foundation. You can't serve from an empty cup. And yet, so many of us were taught \u2014 directly or indirectly \u2014 that good mamas disappear. That the highest expression of love is erasure. That if you still have dreams, needs, desires of your own, you must not be giving enough. That\u2019s not scripture. That\u2019s not wisdom. That\u2019s a lie dressed up in "look at me" clothes. So let\u2019s call it what it is. When you give and give and give until there\u2019s nothing left, that\u2019s not devotion. That\u2019s depletion. And depletion doesn\u2019t raise whole children \u2014 it raises children who learn that love means losing yourself. Is that your living legacy? Proverbs 4:23 warns, \u201cAbove all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.\u201d Everything. Your patience flows from it. Your joy flows from it. The way you respond to your toddler at 6 a.m. or your teenager at midnight or your late conversation with your adult child \u2014 it flows from whatever is left in your heart. And if you\u2019ve emptied it for everyone else and kept nothing for yourself, what\u2019s left to flow? You can't serve from an empty cup. This isn\u2019t a rebuke, mama. This is a rescue. Because the woman who keeps disappearing and calling it love is not being selfless. She\u2019s being silent. And silence, over time, turns into resentment, exhaustion, and an identity you can\u2019t find anymore beneath the pile of everyone else\u2019s needs. DEEP THOUGHT: You can love your family deeply and still be here. Both are possible. Both are necessary. Loving them doesn\u2019t require losing you. In fact, the most powerful thing you can do for your children is show them what it looks like to be a whole woman \u2014 not a hollow one. The K.I.S.S. ~ Know the difference! So where do you start? How do you draw the line between beautiful sacrifice and slow disappearance? 1. AUDIT Your Sacrifice. Ask yourself: \u201cAm I giving from love, or am I giving because I\u2019m afraid of what happens if I stop?\u201d Fear-driven giving isn\u2019t generosity \u2014 it\u2019s survival mode. There\u2019s a difference between choosing to serve your family and feeling like you\u2019ll fall apart \u2014 or they\u2019ll fall apart \u2014 if you don\u2019t. One is love. The other is a cage you built with your own hands and forgot you hold the key to.  \u201cWhen you stop long enough to ask why you\u2019re giving, you\u2019ll finally see what you\u2019ve been giving away.\u201d \u2014 Kristianne Wargo 2. RECLAIM One Thing. Choose one thing you gave up that wasn\u2019t yours to surrender \u2014 a friendship, a hobby, a boundary, a dream. You don\u2019t have to rebuild it today. Just name it. Say it out loud. Write it down. Decide that it still belongs to you, because it does. Motherhood asked for your commitment \u2014 it never asked for your disappearance.  \u201cReclaiming who you are is not selfish. It\u2019s the bravest thing a mama can do for the people she loves most.\u201d \u2014 Kristianne Wargo 3. REDEFINE Love Out Loud. Tell someone \u2014 your spouse, your friend, your journal \u2014 \u201cLoving my family and loving myself are not in competition. I can do both.\u201d Say it even if your voice shakes. Say it even if you don\u2019t fully believe it yet. Because the moment you speak it, you start building a new definition of love \u2014 one that includes you.  \u201cThe love that erases you was never love at all. Real love has room for everyone in the house \u2014 including you.\u201d \u2014 Kristianne Wargo If you\u2019ve been disappearing and dressing it up as devotion, know this isn\u2019t condemnation. It\u2019s a heart and an invitation. You get to come back. You get to take up space in your own life. You get to love fiercely and still have something left for the woman in the mirror. "Sacrifice is beautiful. Disappearing is not. Know the difference." ~ Kristianne Wargo Your children don\u2019t need a ghost of who you used to be. They need the living, breathing, whole version of their mama \u2014 the one who laughs and dreams and rests and stays. The one who teaches them by example that love never asks you to vanish. The love that's present because of your presence. You\u2019re still here. And that matters more than you know. "Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"   \ud83d\udd14 Desire to be supported and encouraged by other like-minded women? Join us at the Kairos FREE Online Community. https:\/\/createyournow.com TAKE A.I.M. ~ Action Ignites Motivation  - This is a complimentary (FREE) coaching call with me. You will discuss your specific situation while gaining tools and strategies to move you forward. (https:\/\/form.jotform.com\/62988215824163) \ud83d\ude4f  Create Your Now TV on Pray.com (https:\/\/pray.com) \ud83c\udfa5  Create Your Now on YouTube (https:\/\/youtube.com\/createyournow) \ud83c\udfa7 Create Your Now on Spotify, Pandora, and Audible. \ud83c\udfb6  Create Your Now on iHeart Radio (http:\/\/www.iheart.com\/show\/263-Create-Your-Now-Your-Best\/) \u270d\ufe0f  YourBestSelfie@CreateYourNow.com  Instagram @CreateYourNow @KristianneWargo Twitter @KristianneWargo @CreateYourNow Facebook www.facebook.com\/TheKISSCoach www.facebook.com\/CreateYourNow   Cover Art by Jenny Hamson Photo by Canva.com   Music by Mandisa - Overcomer http:\/\/www.mandisaofficial.com Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright \u00a9 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music -  Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission. ","author_name":"Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo","author_url":"http:\/\/createyournow.com","html":"