{"version":1,"type":"rich","provider_name":"Libsyn","provider_url":"https:\/\/www.libsyn.com","height":90,"width":600,"title":"When Worrying Doesn't Fix It","description":" You've been worrying about them for months. Maybe years. And here's what all that worry has fixed: nothing. Not their pain. Not their situation. Not the ache in your chest that shows up every time your phone rings. You know worrying doesn't fix it. You know that. And yet you cannot stop. You replay the conversations. You brace for the next phone call. You carry their pain home with you and set it right down on your kitchen table like it belongs there. Friend \u2014 this episode is for you. What This Episode Is About In this episode of the When You Cannot Fix It summer series, we're talking about what happens when you love someone so much that their pain becomes yours \u2014 and your nervous system simply will not rest until it's resolved. This is the invisible backpack. And most of us have been stuffing it full for years. We talk about why we do this \u2014 not just out of love, but because sitting with someone else's pain is deeply uncomfortable. We talk about the real neuroscience behind why your body replays their story again and again. And we talk about what to do instead \u2014 practically, not just spiritually. This isn't about caring less. It's about learning to carry less. What Christian Women Are Searching For \u2014 And What Jesus Says So many Christian women are carrying burdens that were never theirs to carry. Worry that belongs to God. Pain that belongs to someone else. Problems they were never designed to solve. Maybe you recognize yourself here: \u2022 You absorb the emotions of everyone around you \u2014 phone calls leave you heavy for days \u2022 You replay conversations looking for the thing you could have said that would have fixed it \u2022 You live under what I call "doom clouds". \u2022 You cannot rest until everyone around you is okay \u2022 You tell yourself you're just being a good friend, a good mom, a good daughter \u2014 and you're exhausted   That is not weak faith. That is not a character flaw. That is a nervous system that has been working overtime \u2014 protecting you and the people you love. And Jesus meets you right there. "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." \u2014 Matthew 11:28 He is not saying \u2014 stop worrying and then come. He is saying \u2014 come. Weary. Burdened. Carrying what isn't yours. Just come. The Story Behind This Episode Years ago I had a friend who was carrying some of the heaviest things a person can carry. She would call me and I would listen \u2014 and I was always honored to listen. But here's what I didn't realize I was doing. Every time we hung up the phone, I felt a deep ache in my heart. I replayed what she had told me. Not just praying about it \u2014 thought looping. Spinning. Trying to figure out a way to fix her pain. And here's the honest truth of why we do this. We tell ourselves we are trying to help. And we are. But we also want to fix it so that we feel better too. Because sitting with someone else's pain is uncomfortable. And when we take it on, we feel it too. It took me a long time to learn this: sometimes people stay stuck. And carrying their stuckness is not helping them. It is absolutely exhausting you. I also share in this episode about the doom clouds I was living under with my kids \u2014 how they would call me from college, unpack the hard things, and then go live their best lives while I sat back in Iowa under the weight of what they had already set down. This is not a tidy lesson from the other side of healed. This is a real story from a woman who is still learning to lay it down. What You Will Discover in This Episode If you are a Christian woman struggling with worry, anxiety, or the exhausting need to fix people you love \u2014 here is what this episode will give you: \u2022 Why your brain absorbs other people's pain \u2014 and why that is not a spiritual failure \u2022 The simple neuroscience behind why replaying someone's story puts your body in fight or flight again and again \u2022 The invisible backpack \u2014 and what you have been quietly stuffing into it \u2022 The one question that has changed everything: What am I trying to carry that is not mine? \u2022 A practical way to bring what you are carrying to the foot of the cross \u2014 and actually leave it there \u2022 An introduction to the Joy Pause \u2014 learning to stay present with what is actually here instead of time-traveling into worry Scriptures Referenced in This Episode 1 Peter 5:7 "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." Not some of it. Not just your own anxiety. All of it \u2014 including the worry you absorbed from someone else's phone call. Philippians 4:8 "Finally, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable \u2014 think about such things." After you lay it down \u2014 what do you pick back up? Not the replay. Not the what-ifs. Truth. His promises. What is actually lovely and real right now. Matthew 11:28 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Free Resource \u2014 Weary Traveler Reflection and Prayer Guide I made something for you. It is completely free. The Weary Traveler: Rest for the Over-Carrying Soul Reflection and Prayer Guide will walk you gently through eight reflection questions and a prayer of release \u2014 right to the foot of the cross with whatever you are carrying today. If you are already on my email list it is on its way to you. If not \u2014 download it free right here. \ud83d\udc49 [Prayer Guide] Ready to Go Deeper? Sometimes a podcast episode is a beautiful starting place \u2014 and sometimes what you really need is someone to sit with you. Someone to hold space and actually listen. That is what I do as a Master Certified Christian Life Coach. I would love to invite you to pull up a chair. I'm calling these sessions At the Kitchen Table with Michelle. It's a free consultation call \u2014 no strings attached, no pressure, no obligation. Just a conversation, some practical faith-based coaching tools, and a safe place to start. \ud83d\udc49 At the Kitchen Table with Michelle \u2014 Book Your Free Call   About Michelle Diercks Michelle Diercks is a Master Certified Christian Life Coach, speaker, and the author of Promised Rest and Promised Hope published by Concordia Publishing House. She is the host of the Peace in His Presence podcast and lives on a farm in Eastern Iowa with her husband Troy. Michelle helps anxious Christian women find peace through faith, neuroscience, and practical coaching tools \u2014 not from a place of having it all figured out, but from right beside them in the middle of it. Subscribe and Share If this episode spoke to something you've been carrying \u2014 would you share it with one woman who needs to hear it? You never know whose invisible backpack is packed a little too full right now. Find Peace in His Presence on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and everywhere you listen. New episodes dropping all summer. We are going on this journey together \u2014 one week at a time, one thing at a time, learning to lay it all down. You were never meant to carry all of this, friend. And you don't have to.   Connect with Michelle \ud83c\udf10 michellediercks.com \ud83d\udcd6 Promised Rest and Promised Hope \u2014 available wherever books are sold ","author_name":"Peace in His Presence: Hope for the Anxious Heart","author_url":"http:\/\/michellediercks.com\/podcast\/","html":"