{"version":1,"type":"rich","provider_name":"Libsyn","provider_url":"https:\/\/www.libsyn.com","height":90,"width":600,"title":"135: Dr. Jeff Wetzler \u2014 Why People Don\u2019t Tell You the Truth (and the Questions That Change Everything)","description":"\u27a1\ufe0f Get my free weekly newsletter (The Intentional Letter): https:\/\/courses.calwalters.me\/signup Follow Jeff's work: https:\/\/www.jeffwetzler.com\/ Dr. Jeff Wetzler, author of Ask, joins Cal Walters to unpack a leadership blind spot: the crucial information your team has\u2026 but isn\u2019t telling you. Jeff explains the \u201cleft-hand column\u201d (what people think and feel but don\u2019t say), the four reasons honesty gets filtered, and the ASK Approach\u2014a practical framework for choosing curiosity, building psychological safety, asking better questions, and closing the loop when feedback is hard to act on. If you want better decisions, healthier relationships, and fewer surprises, this conversation will give you a playbook. Episode Outline \/ Timestamps 00:00 The hidden information problem 00:41 Guest intro + what you\u2019ll learn 01:37 Chris Argyris + the \u201cleft-hand column\u201d tool 08:07 Four reasons people don\u2019t tell you the truth 12:06 Why smart\/successful leaders struggle to learn 13:55 Jeff\u2019s near miss: one question that revealed the truth 15:45 Psychological safety: why curiosity alone isn\u2019t enough 21:35 Reactivity: the biggest predictor of future honesty 22:18 Responding well to hard feedback 25:00 The ASK Approach: Choose curiosity 29:48 Curiosity killers + \u201cWhen you\u2019re furious, get curious\u201d 32:29 Busy leaders: \u201cPay now or pay later\u201d 36:40 Quality questions vs. crummy questions 40:04 Better questions for feedback and performance reviews 44:07 Go-to questions for parties and relationships 47:48 Questions as a gift: helping others gain clarity 49:55 How to handle feedback you won\u2019t follow 51:08 Reflect & reconnect: sift it, turn it, and close the loop 53:13 Cal\u2019s takeaways and practical challenges Practical Challenges to Try This Week Replace: \u201cDo you have feedback for me?\u201d With: \u201cWhat\u2019s one thing I could do differently that would make your life easier?\u201d When you feel defensive, ask one question before making a statement. When someone brings hard truth, try: \u201cThat\u2019s hard to hear\u2014and I\u2019m really glad you told me.\u201d   ","author_name":"Intentional Leader with Cal Walters","author_url":"https:\/\/www.calwalters.me\/","html":"