{"version":1,"type":"rich","provider_name":"Libsyn","provider_url":"https:\/\/www.libsyn.com","height":90,"width":600,"title":"Tommy Loses John To Addiction & Tim To Cancer","description":"On episode 6 of Season 8 of The Surviving Siblings Podcast\u00ae, host, Maya Roffler sits down with Tommy, a surviving sibling who lost two brothers\u2014John to addiction and Tim to cancer. Tommy shares a powerful testimony of family, trauma, guilt, grief, and recovery offering a rare and vulnerable glimpse into what it means to survive sibling loss from two very different but equally devastating causes. Raised in Queens, New York, Tommy opens up about growing up in a family marked by love, loyalty, and generational addiction. He candidly recounts the progression of his brother John's substance use following a workplace injury and the day he tragically discovered his brother unresponsive. Just two days later, Tommy\u2019s beloved Aunt Angela, like a second mother to him, died by suicide. Years later, after achieving long-term sobriety, Tommy would face unimaginable grief again, this time, losing his twin brother Tim to 9\/11-related cancer after witnessing his hard-fought battle to get sober. With 30+ years of recovery, Tommy now dedicates his life to helping families through his organization, Sober Companion Los Angeles, supporting others impacted by addiction and loss. This episode holds space for anyone navigating complex grief, guilt, and healing after losing a sibling to addiction, overdose, or cancer\u2014and reminds us that asking for help is an act of strength.   In This Episode: (0:00:00) \u2013 Meet Tommy and His Family in Queens Tommy introduces his close-knit, working-class New York family, their upbringing in Queens, and the presence of generational addiction beginning with his parents. (0:02:00) \u2013 Early Drinking, Generational Patterns, and Family Dynamics He shares how his father\u2019s alcoholism shaped his childhood and how both he and his brothers began drinking in adolescence. (0:05:00) \u2013 John\u2019s Injury, Prescription Pills, and Spiraling Addiction Tommy recalls the moment his brother was prescribed opioids after a construction injury, which rapidly escalated into addiction. (0:09:00) \u2013 The Day Everything Changed Tommy recounts in vivid detail the day he and his father found John unconscious, brought him home, and later discovered he had died of an overdose. (0:11:00) \u2013 Guilt, Grief, and a Second Tragedy Two days after John\u2019s death, their Aunt Angela, who helped raise them died by suicide, compounding the trauma and sorrow for the entire family. (0:14:00) \u2013 The Emotional Fallout and Drinking Resumes Tommy shares how he relapsed after John\u2019s death and reflects on the toll it took on both his parents and his own mental health. (0:18:00) \u2013 Twin Bond and Tim\u2019s Role in His Healing He describes the twin bond he shared with Tim, how they held each other up in the wake of loss, and how the absence of John left a deep void. (0:20:00) \u2013 Tommy\u2019s Turning Point and Path to Sobriety After years of drinking and legal trouble, Tommy made the decision to get sober in 1994\u2014walking into a 12-step meeting and never looking back. (0:27:00) \u2013 Tim\u2019s Parallel Journey and Struggles While Tommy stayed sober, Tim continued to struggle with alcohol for years, finally making progress in late 2019 after joining a recovery program. (0:28:00) \u2013 9\/11, First Response, and a Cancer Diagnosis Tommy shares how Tim responded to the September 11 attacks, working at Ground Zero\u2014and how years later, he was diagnosed with 9\/11-related cancer. (0:33:00) \u2013 Hospitalization, Final Days, and the Last Promise Tommy recounts Tim\u2019s rapid decline, the powerful final conversations they shared, and the promise he made at his brother\u2019s bedside before removing life support. (0:36:00) \u2013 Coping with Losing a Twin He opens up about the heartbreak of losing Tim, what it meant to lose his \u201cperson,\u201d and the impact on his life, sobriety, and ongoing grief. (0:38:00) \u2013 Sober Companion Los Angeles: From Grief to Purpose Tommy shares how he turned his pain into purpose by founding Sober Companion LA to help families in crisis, offering interventions, support, and 24\/7 recovery coaching nationwide. (0:43:00) \u2013 Advice for Siblings Struggling with Guilt and \u201cCould I Have Saved Them?\u201d Tommy speaks directly to listeners who\u2019ve lost a sibling to addiction\u2014offering compassionate, practical advice on releasing guilt, seeking professional help, and finding peace in grief. (0:51:00) \u2013 The Night He Almost Relapsed \u2014 and Chose Life He reflects on the night of Tim\u2019s death, when he stood outside a bar ready to drink\u2014but made a different choice, asked for help, and recommitted to his sobriety. (0:55:00) \u2013 Continuing the Mission and Staying Sober Together Tommy concludes by encouraging siblings to reach out, stay connected, and know they are not alone in grief or in healing. \ud83c\udfa7 Listen to the full episode of \u201cTommy Loses John To Addiction & Tim To Cancer\u201d \u2014 streaming now on all major platforms. This episode is sponsored by Sober Companion Los Angeles. Connect with Tommy:  Instagram: https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/sobercompanionlosangeles Yelp: https:\/\/www.yelp.com\/biz\/sober-companion-los-angeles-los-angeles Sober Companion Website: https:\/\/www.sobercompanionlosangeles.com\/ Sober Companion NYC: http:\/\/www.sobercompanionnyc.com\/ Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/survivingsiblingspodcast\/ Maya's Instagram: https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/mayaroffler\/ TikTok: https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/@survivingsiblingspodcast Twitter: https:\/\/x.com\/survivingsibpod Website: thesurvivingsiblings.com Facebook Group: The Surviving Siblings Podcast YouTube: The Surviving Siblings Podcast Patreon: https:\/\/www.patreon.com\/TheSurvivingSiblingsPodcast   ","author_name":"The Surviving Siblings\u00ae","author_url":"https:\/\/www.thesurvivingsiblings.com","html":"