{"version":1,"type":"rich","provider_name":"Libsyn","provider_url":"https:\/\/www.libsyn.com","height":90,"width":600,"title":"336. How To Be Awesome When Someone Is A Jerk To You","description":"You\u2019re going to love this podcast episode so much that you\u2019re going to look forward to the next time someone is a jerk to you.    Because we are programming ourselves to be ready for it today!  The next time someone says something rude or belittles you\u2026 you\u2019re ready for it with the best ever responses.   Let\u2019s use an example of something that was said to me last weekend\u2026 I was at a party and a girl came up to me with the oddest tone and said\u2026  "I like your dress.  My favorite look is a desperate housewife"   Ready for the response?  You take one confident breath and you say, \u201cdid you say that to try to hurt me?\u201d   Or another option, a confident laugh and then, \u201ccan you say that again?\u201d  It\u2019s SO GOOD!      I learned this from trial attorney Jefferson Fisher and it\u2019s honestly changed the way I respond to things.  I don\u2019t absorb their emotion or their story\u2026 my response is all mine\u2026. I\u2019m not letting them hijack my emotional state.    Pause, breathe, regain control Use silence and a deep breath before responding. Silence makes the other person sit with their words and prevents you from reacting impulsively. Your breath is your pause button against fight-or-flight reactions. Don\u2019t absorb their negativity You don\u2019t have to internalize or validate rude behavior. Your dignity is preserved by staying calm and detached. Ask clarifying or exposing questions \u201cCan you repeat that?\u201d \/ \u201cCan you say that again?\u201d \u201cDid you say that to try to hurt me?\u201d These questions force the other person to either own or retract their words, shifting control back to you. Use fewer words; be precise Keep your response short, clear, and confident. Don\u2019t over-explain or justify yourself. A crisp question or boundary carries more weight than a long defense. If they escalate further: disengage calmly. If it\u2019s someone powerful (boss, authority): ask respectfully, e.g. \u201cCan you help me understand what you meant by that?\u201d If you freeze or can\u2019t think of what to say: your default safe move is pause + \u201cCan you repeat that?\u201d ","author_name":"How To Be Awesome At Everything Podcast","author_url":"https:\/\/howtobeawesomeateverything.libsyn.com","html":"