{"version":1,"type":"rich","provider_name":"Libsyn","provider_url":"https:\/\/www.libsyn.com","height":90,"width":600,"title":"268 The Push-Pull of ADHD and Autism: Stretching Without Breaking","description":"The Push-Pull of ADHD and Autism: Stretching Without Breaking In this candid conversation, Patricia Young (she\/her) and B Lourenco (she\/her) dive deep into the realities of living with ADHD, autism, and other forms of neurodivergence. They explore the push-pull between self-accommodation and stretching ourselves, how shame and internalized ableism impact daily life, and what it means to create realistic support systems at home, in relationships, and in the workplace. Expect raw honesty, relatable stories, and practical insights for navigating neurodivergent life. WHAT YOU\u2019LL HEAR IN THIS EPISODE \u00b7 The ongoing \u201cdriver\u2019s seat battle\u201d between ADHD and autism. \u00b7 The push-pull between making accommodations and stretching ourselves beyond comfort. \u00b7 Parenting a neurodivergent young adult while balancing when to push and when to allow rest. \u00b7 Task initiation struggles \u2014 from making banana bread to cooking meals. \u00b7 Body doubling as a powerful tool to reduce shame and spark motivation. \u00b7 The \u201ccrisper\/rotter\u201d effect \u2014 guilt over wasted food and executive dysfunction. \u00b7 Financial and practical impacts of task initiation challenges. \u00b7 How privilege plays into having options like prepared or frozen meals when cooking feels impossible. \u00b7 The cost of pushing through fatigue and flares with conditions like POTS and MCAS. \u00b7 \u201cFuture me\u201d thinking \u2014 and the difficulties neurodivergent folks have with impermanence. \u00b7 Shame as the \u201cice cream scoop\u201d on top of disability struggles. \u00b7 Why diagnosis matters: language helps reduce shame and prevent repeating harmful patterns. \u00b7 How powerlessness, and an attempt to gain autonomy can show up in small, reactive choices (like leaving a Facebook group). \u00b7 Sensory sensitivities in family systems \u2014 how lack of accommodations can lead to dysfunction. \u00b7 Practical accommodations for noise-sensitive parents and their kids. \u00b7 Workplace challenges: 40-hour weeks, return-to-office pressures, and capitalism\u2019s rigidity. \u00b7 Creative problem-solving in disabled and neurodivergent communities. \u00b7 The deep fear of being uncared for and alone if we can\u2019t keep up. \u00b7 Hyper-independence and isolation in the ADHD\/autistic community. \u00b7 Internalized ableism and the \u201cshoulds\u201d that drive shame and burnout. \u00b7 Neurodivergence as a dynamic disability \u2014 what\u2019s possible one day isn\u2019t always possible the next. \u00b7 Radical acceptance as a path toward reducing judgment and finding relief. SOUND BITES \u00b7 \u201cIt begs the question of, okay, is that okay? Can we just say that\u2019s how it is?\u201d \u2013 B Lourenco \u00b7 \u201cInstead of putting our energy into addressing the gap, folks will take the great divide and then put a scoop of shame on top of it.\u201d \u2013 B Lourenco \u00b7 \u201cAll the terrible things that we tell ourselves\u2026 if I didn\u2019t have that awareness, I\u2019d just keep repeating these patterns.\u201d \u2013 Patricia Young \u00b7 \u201cIn order to truly accommodate ourselves, we have to acknowledge that it\u2019s as hard as it is and that we\u2019re as disabled as we are.\u201d \u2013 B Lourenco \u00b7 \u201cSometimes I have to ask myself, what if what you\u2019re going through is exactly where you need to be?\u201d \u2013 Patricia Young SENSITIVITY IS NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR; IT\u2019S HOW YOUR BRAIN IS WIRED You are not broken. You were shaped by systems that weren\u2019t built for you. You deserve rest, joy, and support exactly as you are. TOPICS COVERED (please adjust for addition of introduction) 00:00 Navigating Neurodivergence: A Personal Journey 02:59 Understanding Accommodations: Balancing Needs and Expectations 05:48 The Push-Pull of Task Initiation and Self-Care 08:33 Shame and Support: The Role of Community 11:35 The Impact of Environment on Neurodivergent Individuals 14:26 Workplace Challenges: The Struggle for Accommodations 17:16 Building Bridges: Community and Creative Solutions 20:00 Radical Acceptance: Embracing Our Reality 22:48 The Journey of Self-Discovery and Identity 25:42 The Dynamic Nature of Neurodivergence 29:02 Finding Joy in the Present Moment 31:47 The Bigger Picture: Building a Better Future 34:47 Conclusion: Resources and Future Endeavors PODCAST HOST Patricia Young (she\/her) was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it\u2019s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile, OCD and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcasts Unapologetically Sensitive and Unapologetically AuDHD to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren\u2019t alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you Patricia\u2019s website, podcast episodes and more: www.unapologeticallysensitive.com PODCAST GUEST B Lourenco, MA, LMHC (she\/her) is a licensed mental health counselor, educator, advocate, and activist. B has been working in community support for nearly 20 years and is committed to social change on all system levels. Seeing mental health advocacy as a way to serve the community, she earned a Master of Arts degree in Clinical Psychology, with a Systems Emphasis, in 2015 and began her private practice, B Lourenco Therapy in 2017.    B has also worked in the public school system, providing support to students with behavioral issues that made attending school challenging for them. Highly trained in Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA), B became a district-wide expert in supporting neurodivergent students. It was during this work that she began to be critical of the medical models of support for neurodivergence, including ABA. Making the shift from the medical to the Neurodiversity-affirming model has allowed her to finally identify her own neurodivergence, including Autism and ADHD.    Combining her lived experience of neurodivergence, along with years of anti-oppression work, B is passionate about helping others untangle themselves from harmful practices and align themselves with those that instead support marginalized communities. In addition to CE events for healthcare providers, she has also been a speaker on panels and podcasts, and also facilitates community based workshops. https:\/\/www.blourencotherapy.com   LINKS  Cascadia Training: https:\/\/cascadia-training.com  Imani Barbarin\u2014crutches_and_spice IG https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/crutches_and_spice\/  To write a review in itunes: click on this link https:\/\/itunes.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/unapologetically-sensitive\/id1440433481?mt=2 select \u201clisten on Apple Podcasts\u201d chose \u201copen in itunes\u201d choose \u201cratings and reviews\u201d click to rate the number of starts click \u201cwrite a review\u201d Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657\/ Closed\/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/groups\/2099705880047619\/ Instagram-- https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/unapologeticallysensitive\/ Youtube-- https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg\/videos?view_as=subscriber Tik Tok--https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/@unapologeticallysensitiv Unapologetically AuDHD Podcast-- https:\/\/unapologeticallysensitive.com\/unapologeticallyaudhd\/ e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com   ","author_name":"Unapologetically Sensitive","author_url":"https:\/\/unapologeticallysensitive.com\/unapologetically-sensitive\/","html":"