{"version":1,"type":"rich","provider_name":"Libsyn","provider_url":"https:\/\/www.libsyn.com","height":90,"width":600,"title":"226: End-of-Summer Conversations","description":"Labor Day here in the U.S. on the first Monday in September is near the top of my list of favorite holidays. There\u2019s a freshness and energy about this time of year I find appealing. But before we launch into fall, there are some end-of-summer conversations I\u2019ve recently had that I don\u2019t want to forget because they add to the richness and energy of autumn. So I\u2019m going to give you only a brief snap shot of some of them because they deserve more reflection than I have time to consider now. I bet you\u2019ve had some similar end-of-summer conversations you\u2019d like to think more about later this fall. I\u2019m going to give you mine, but I\u2019d like to hear about yours. But first, I\u2019m John Certalic, and you are listening to episode 226 of You Were Made for This, the podcast about finding joy in being the person God created each of us to be. Namely, someone who reflects the character, image, and likeness of God in all our relationships. It\u2019s the THIS we were made for. Now here\u2019s my list of end-of-summer conversation I want to think more about later. I think each one of them could be a podcast episode in the future. We\u2019ll see. End of summer conversation with Meghan First off, we had a missionary couple stay with us recently. I\u2019ll call them Harry and Meghan, which may surprise you aren\u2019t their real names.  During their with us Meghan said she found my blog post from a few weeks ago helpful, \u201cGrief Doesn\u2019t Follow the Rules.\u201d She forwarded it to a relative who experienced the death of a child, and then to a co-worker whose adult son took his own life. Meghan went on to say that the relative was disappointed in people who did not understand her grief. A counselor told Meghan, \u201cIt\u2019s not your job to understand her grief. A counselor\u2019s job is to help her understand her own grief.\u201d  And then this related thought that the counselor told Meghan, \u201cGrief is inevitable. Misery is optional.\u201d I\u2019m going to be thinking more about these comments. And also, what should we expect from our friends when we ar grieving? More from Meghan Before she and Harry left us, there\u2019s one more end-of-summer conversation I had with Meghan that I\u2019ll be thinking about for sometime this fall. A friend of hers is in a church that had a weekend conference where the speaker talked extensively about demon possession, and how if believers and followers of Jesus are not careful, demons can possess them. This bothered Meghan\u2019s friend so she did quite a bit of research into whether or not demons can actually dwell inside a Jesus follower. She concluded they can\u2019t because the spirit of God living within a believer cannot co-exist with a demon. It raises the question does the pastor agree with her or with the conference speaker. If he agrees with the conference speaker that Christians can be demon possessed, she doesn\u2019t think she could stay at the church because of this seismic theological difference. Meghan went on to say, \u201cMy friend has been going to this church for decades. All her friends are at this church This church is her life. It would be heartbreaking to have to leave.\u201d Yikes, the anguish this must cause Meghan\u2019s friend. I don\u2019t remember where this one came from I heard someone say in an another end-of-summer conversation, \u201cBehavior never lies.\u201d This is  a really helpful principle in dealing with interpersonal relationships. What a person does reveals more than what they say. This especially true with teenage children. My end-of-summer conversation with Harry Then there\u2019s the conversation I had with Harry, Meghan\u2019s husband. We told him we have started asking people with tattoos, \u201ctell me the story of your tattoo. What does it mean to you.\u201d We\u2019ve noticed lately that wait staff in restaurants often have tattoos. Harry is a leader within his mission organization and he mentioned that in a staff meeting he said that everyone has a story. I\u2019m sure you\u2019ve heard this before. But then he added, \u201cWe honor someone when we ask them to tell their story.\u201d    The word \u201chonor\u201d just jumped out me. I\u2019m going to be thinking more about this. People with a difficult past We then started talking about people who don\u2019t want to share their story. Who don\u2019t want you to know about them. Why is that?  If we honor people when we ask them to tell us their story, why do some people run the other way? One possibility, and this is just a guess, is that some people feel shame over their past, even if what happened to them was out of their control. So they play it close to the vest with people, and rarely disclose much about themself.  This reminded me of my friend Dan who grew up in a very abusive home as a a child. Some people who had similar childhoods will carry this around with them the rest of their life and define themselves in terms of the terrible things that happened to them. But for Dan, he says, \u201cAll the bad stuff that happened to me in childhood is certainly part of my story. But it is not an active part. I prefer to focus on the active part of my story.\u201d So what about you? Enough about me. I wonder what end-of-summer conversations you\u2019ve had that will carry you into the fall thinking about them. Were there any thought provoking questions or insightful observations about life?  I hope so I\u2019d love to hear from you about them. Closing As we close up shop for today, I hope your thinking was stimulated by today\u2019s show, to reflect upon meaningful conversations you had with people as summer gives way to fall. Well, that\u2019s it for today. I\u2019d love to hear your thoughts or reactions to today\u2019s episode. Just go to the show notes for today\u2019s program at JohnCertalic.com, then scroll down to the end to the \u201cLeave a comment\u201d box. Finally, remember to spread a little relational sunshine around the people you meet this week. Spark some joy for them.  And I\u2019ll see you again next time. Goodbye for now. Prior most recent episode 225: A Joy to Be Around Other episodes or resources related to today\u2019s shows 139: Why Should I Listen to This Podcast? 021: The Most Important Relationship of All All past and future episodes can be found at JohnCertalic.com ","author_name":"You Were Made for This","author_url":"https:\/\/www.johncertalic.com","html":"