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Purity Culture Sets Us Up for Failure w/ Reuben Johnson
Reuben Johnson is one half of FlyDuo, a husband-and-wife team behind the pleasure-forward platform SexTech n' Chill, originally from the suburbs of Boston where growing up in a strict religious environment meant sex education was mostly abstinence, shame and silence. In this episode we talk about purity culture, abstinence-only sex education and how religious messaging around sex can leave people completely unprepared for real intimacy. We get into the science behind pleasure, why nervous system regulation matters in the bedroom, the myth of “think about baseball” when people struggle with performance anxiety, and how honest conversations about sex can actually help protect people from harm. We also talk about building a pleasure-centered relationship, the work Reuben and his wife are doing with SexTech n' Chill, and why comprehensive sex education is still so controversial in the United States. Want more? Catch bonus Reddit story reactions, private chats and more on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck Get my Yes / No / Maybe List  or Fck Like The Movies full course _________________________________________________ Where to find Reuben: SexTech n' Chill: https://sextechnchill.com FlyDuo: https://xoflyduo.com Instagram: @sextechnchill  YouTube: @SexTechNChill   Where to find Arielle: Instagram: @birdsandbeesdontfck TikTok: @birdsandbeesdontfck Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 5p PT / 8p ET: https://www.youtube.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck Love jewelry that doubles as a vibrator?  Me too! Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here:  https://lovecrave.com/arielle   Episode Cheat Sheet 02:10 Museum of Sex panel and meeting other sex educators 04:02 Consent, body language and what animals teach us about boundaries 08:36 Trauma responses, fawning and reading nonverbal cues 11:05 Nervous system regulation, anxiety and grounding techniques 15:02 Communication, emotional safety and better sex 19:11 Performance anxiety and why “think about baseball” is terrible sex advice 22:05 Vulnerability, trust and sexual confidence in relationships 24:40 Growing up in Boston and avoiding sex education conversations 26:40 Religious purity culture and sexual shame 29:10 The first real sex education class in high school 31:03 Condoms, lube and the basics abstinence-only programs skip 33:28 Why abstinence-only sex education leaves people unprepared 34:15 Dr. Joycelyn Elders and the fight for comprehensive sex education 36:01 Why pleasure and eroticism challenge systems of control 41:00 Social media censorship and the fight for online sex education 46:54 Porn history, kink and the evolution of sexuality 52:20 Wedding night sex after purity culture 55:50 Building Sex Tech & Chill and pleasure-centered relationships
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
https://instagram.com/birdsandbeesdontfck
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