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  <title>262 Breaking Down Internalized Ableism</title>
  <description>  Breaking Down Internalized Ableism&amp;amp;nbsp; Summary In this conversation, Patricia explores the concept of internalized ableism, particularly among neurodivergent individuals. She discusses how societal stigma and expectations can lead to negative self-perceptions and feelings of inadequacy. Patricia shares personal experiences and insights on how internalized ableism manifests in various aspects of life, including relationships, self-acceptance, and the pressure to conform to neurotypical standards. She emphasizes the importance of unlearning these hurtful beliefs and embracing one's neurodivergent identity with compassion and understanding. &amp;amp;nbsp;  HIGHLIGHTS &amp;amp;nbsp;  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Internalized ableism is the unconscious adoption of negative beliefs about oneself due to societal stigma.  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Neurodivergent individuals often feel pressure to conform to neurotypical standards, which can lead to trauma.  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Resting is a valid need and should not be seen as a failure.  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Asking for accommodations is essential for well-being and should not induce guilt.  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; The concept of 'high functioning' can be harmful and does not reflect true capabilities.  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Time agnosia is a common experience for neurodivergent individuals.  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Self-compassion is crucial in overcoming internalized ableism.  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Relationships can be affected by the fear of being a burden.  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Unlearning internalized ableism involves recognizing and challenging societal expectations.  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Embracing neurodivergence includes acknowledging strengths and practicing self-acceptance.   115 SPECIFIC POINTS DISCUSSED  1.&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; How internalized ableism shows up in everyday life  o&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Masking, pushing through burnout, or feeling &amp;quot;lazy&amp;quot; when you're resting.  2.&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Messages we absorbed growing up  o&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; From school, parents, peers, or media about being &amp;quot;too much,&amp;quot; &amp;quot;distracted,&amp;quot; &amp;quot;weird,&amp;quot; or &amp;quot;wrong.&amp;quot;  3.&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Perfectionism and people-pleasing as survival  o&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; How needing to be “better” or “easy to manage” is often rooted in internalized shame.  4.&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; The trap of “not disabled enough” or “faking it”  o&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; How we invalidate our own struggles because we don't “look” stereotypically disabled.  5.&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; ADHD, autism, OCD &amp;amp;amp; “high-functioning” narratives  o&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; The myth of being “high functioning” and how it reinforces ableist expectations.  6.&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Feeling guilt for needing accommodations or rest  o&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; That voice that says “you’re being difficult” when you ask for what you actually need.  7.&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Shame around executive dysfunction  o&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Struggling to start tasks, follow through, or manage time — and blaming yourself.  8.&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Rejecting your own needs to fit in  o&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Forcing eye contact, avoiding stimming, hiding rituals, not using noise-canceling headphones in public, etc.  9.&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; The pressure to be “independent” all the time  o&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; How internalized capitalism + ableism equates needing support with being a failure.  10.&amp;amp;nbsp;  Comparing yourself to neurotypical peers  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Especially in productivity, relationships, or emotional regulation.  11.&amp;amp;nbsp;  “If I can do it sometimes, I should always be able to” myth  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Inconsistent ability = inconsistent worth? Nope. Talk about spoon theory and fluctuating capacity.  12.&amp;amp;nbsp;  How OCD-specific traits are misunderstood or mocked  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; And how that seeps into how you see yourself (e.g., feeling “crazy,” “irrational,” or “a burden”).  13.&amp;amp;nbsp;  Internalized ableism in dating &amp;amp;amp; relationships  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Fear of being too much, too emotional, or too rigid — and minimizing yourself as a result.  14.&amp;amp;nbsp;  How healing looks like reclaiming your needs unapologetically  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Self-accommodation, boundaries, rest, and neurodivergent joy as rebellion.  15.&amp;amp;nbsp;  Relearning self-compassion and identity pride  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; Ending with hope: unmasking, connecting with community, and defining success on your own terms. &amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;   SOUND BITES  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; &amp;quot;Rest is resistance.&amp;quot;  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; &amp;quot;You are not broken.&amp;quot;  ·&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp; &amp;quot;You deserve rest, joy, and support.&amp;quot; &amp;amp;nbsp;&amp;amp;nbsp;   SENSITIVITY IS NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR; IT’S HOW YOUR BRAIN IS WIRED   You are not broken. You were shaped by systems that weren’t built for you. You deserve rest, joy, and support exactly as you are.&amp;amp;nbsp;  &amp;amp;nbsp;  CHAPTERS  (please add time for addition of introduction)  00:00 Understanding Internalized Ableism  02:40 The Impact of Societal Expectations  05:31 Navigating Personal Experiences with Internalized Ableism  08:18 The Struggle for Accommodations  10:55 Executive Dysfunction and Inconsistent Abilities  14:01 The Pressure of Productivity  16:53 Feeling 'Not Enough' in Neurodivergence  19:43 Unlearning Internalized Ableism  22:27 Building Self-Compassion and Acceptance&amp;amp;nbsp;   PODCAST HOST  Patricia was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it’s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.&amp;amp;nbsp; Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile, OCD and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.&amp;amp;nbsp; She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren’t alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.&amp;amp;nbsp; Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you  LINKS  Rest Is Resistance: Free yourself from grind culture and reclaim your life  by Tricia Hersey.  Neurodivergent Online Course--  https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/neurodivergent-online-courses/  Receive the top 10 most downloaded episodes of the podcast--  https://www.subscribepage.com/e6z6e6&amp;amp;nbsp;  To write a review in itunes:    click on this link   https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2   select “listen on Apple Podcasts”   chose “open in itunes”   choose “ratings and reviews”   click to rate the number of starts   click “write a review”  &amp;amp;nbsp;  Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com  Facebook--   https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/  Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/  Instagram--  https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/  Youtube--   https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber  Tik Tok--https://www.tiktok.com/@unapologeticallysensitiv  e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com   Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive   Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson  www.andyrobinson.com &amp;amp;nbsp; </description>
  <author_name>Unapologetically Sensitive</author_name>
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