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Things Happen For You Not To You
Mark brings up the topic - Love of fate, love of one’s fate - "Amore Fati" Stoicism Things happen for you, not to you Personal accountability and self awareness Mark asks Jim to share the back story Three conversations with three good friends Jim did a deep dive into Amore Fate. The Japanese version “wabi sabi” The connection to imperfection People with victim mentalities are not pleasant to be around Mark talks about personal accountability and self awareness…learning through failure Jim shares a couple of pet phrases. Bitter or better and don’t wish it was easier, wish you were better Everything is a choice Mark talks about “the pause”. Don’t react. Wait. Regain objectivity Jim came up with 10 words 1.  Gratitude - Jim asks Mark about his daily practice 2. Presence - be in the moment. Mark talks about paying attention and young people struggling with attention. Jim cites California law taking phones from kids at school 3. Embrace 4. Response 5. Peace. Mark cites peace of mind 6. Meaning and the connection to suffering. Mark brings up Victor Frankel’s man’s Search For Meaning. Mark suggests that suffering m makes you stronger…it’s a choice 7. Forgiveness. Mark sheds light on forgiving yourself 8. Self Compassion. Jim says it takes work to forgive Mark talks about forgiving his ex wife 9. Mundane Beauty - Mark brings up his dad and how he sees new things with a childlike wonder Life isn’t a highlight film - Jim Mark calls the mundane practice.  Weight rooms and running stairs 10. Authenticity and inauthenticity (Our Vice President) Mark talks about applying these concepts to life Acceptance Explore your reactions to things and maybe change your reactions Look for the grace in things. Mark reframes his forgiveness of his ex wife and how he contextualizes her difficult childhood. Put yourself in the other persons shoes…gets you to grace Jim goes back to embracing. Embracing adversity Mark talks about consistency. The need to practice. It’s never done Jim frames the discussion as being a persons worldview Mark says emotional decisions are often bad decisions. Use the pause Jim says these concepts are timeless and cross cultural constructs Mark shares his daily practice and how all religions have very much the same concepts Jim revisits “don’t be nice, be kind”. Mark says nice is inauthentic Mark says we’re all going through the same shit Jim asks us to be men. There are too many boys out there DEI gets some laughs Jim shares “the search for meaning in the imperfection” He closes with meaning in the incomplete Mark frames incomplete in terms of shipping your work at 80 or 90 % complete Jim agrees completely
Imperfect Mens Club
https://www.imperfectmensclub.com
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